I have long believed the Gronkmonster to be either a robot, an alien or some combination of the two. If his unbelievable season was not enough to prove this point without a doubt, the fact that he is somehow able to run after his gruesome ankle injury should do it. We all saw the replays; his ankle bent backwards. Ankles shouldn't bend like that. Well, human ankles...
With 50% of all Super Bowl discussions revolving around Gronkowski's injury, wouldn't it just be fitting for Hernandez to be the tight end that burns the Giants? At least in Hernandez' case, "burning" the Giants would simply be a metaphor. If Gronkowski were to burn the Giants, he would probably do it by shooting lasers out of his eyes.
Because his name makes me think of Ridley from Metroid, and he's scary.
We all know he's one of the best quarterbacks of all time, but there's extra incentive to keep Tom Brady out of the end zone: not having to see him dance.
I can just imagine a terrible USA Networks show about a lawyer/football player whose name is Devin McCourty. In court, McCourty is the savviest of defense attorneys, always thinking outside the box to get his defendants off the hook. On the field, he's an in-the-box safety who is no stranger to incurring a penalty. The name of the show? Illegal Procedure (tagline: "The defense never rests").
There can be a crazy cast of recurring characters including McCourty's nemesis: a tough court judge who also moonlights as an NFL line judge. "Order, Mr. McCourty! You're out of bounds!" Just think of the possibilities...
Mean, mean man. He's listed at 6-2, 325 pounds, but I wouldn't be surprised if it was closer to 350 pounds. Wilfork has been great all season, but he has been nearly unblockable in his previous two games. No quarterback can play well when they are getting constant pressure up the middle, and the Giants' O-line couldn't do much to stop the 49ers' defensive line. Keeping Wilfork at bay is the offensive line's number one priority.
Jerod Mayo and Rob Ninkovich
Two excellent linebackers, and the best Patriots defenders not named "Wilfork."
With all the attention that the Patriots' two fantastic tight ends get, it's easy to forget that Welker was actually the Patriots' leading receiver. Hopefully Tom Coughlin and Perry Fewell have not forgotten. Welker's 1569 yards were second best in the NFL, and his 122 receptions were easily most in all the land. He is a menace over the middle, and almost impossible to shut down.
He's a pretty good punt returner and a decent slot receiver, but Edelman was shifted to defensive back late in the season because the Patriots had no one better to play in the secondary. Everyone had a good laugh about this desperation move, and at the overall state of the Patriots' secondary. But you know who wasn't laughing? Bill Belichick. I have this fear that will Edelman shock us all and come up with one huge play in the secondary. Then he'll look straight into the camera and say "who's laughing now?" And then I'll cry.
The best NFL coach of the era and possibly of all time. Not really much explanation needed here.
Because his name makes me think of Zoltar from Big, and he's scary.